The vibe at a Queer sober rave is “a little bit wild and a little bit wholesome” according to organisers who run alcohol-free LGBTQ+ events.

The House of Happiness was launched after its founders realised there was a gap in the market for dry, daytime, events which mimic a traditional night out.

Neil Hudson-Basing, one of the co-creators, was inspired to help create the raves after he gave up alcohol for health reasons six years ago. He was looking for a “big, bold, colourful party”, as opposed to the wellness or recovery themes that often dominate LGBTQ+ sober events.

“What we [other founders] love is partying,” says Neil, who began working on House of Happiness in October 2022. “None of us have an addiction or recovery story, none of us are interested in wellbeing or mindfulness.”

With DJs, dancers, a photographer, and a fully stocked alcohol-free bar, the parties are everything you would expect from a typical club – without the 3am stumble home.

Neil described how the culture around alcohol and excessive drinking within the Queer community draws people in and makes it difficult to get sober.

A 2024 report by Drinkaware found 70% of LGBTQ+ drinkers engage in binge drinking, and members of the community are more likely than the general population to list coping and fitting in as reasons they consume alcohol.  

We wish that people knew how fun and how crazy life can be without alcohol – life can actually be better

Neil found people less understanding when he chose to get sober for health reasons as opposed to those who stop drinking because of addiction. “When you choose to give it up for lifestyle reasons it’s a harder sell to get your friends on board,” he says. “People don’t take you seriously, they’ll take the p***, they’ll try and tempt you. I’m coming up to six and a half years sober and I’ve still got friends that are weird about it.”

Neil also explained how LGBTQ+ events have traditionally catered to cisgender, gay men, and that The House of Happiness has tried to counteract this by focusing on inclusivity, with rules including “respect space, respect pronouns, respect individuality”.

“We’ve all felt that feeling of not belonging, whether that is at a regular club where everyone is hammered or in a gay club because you don’t fit a certain mould. We wish that people knew how fun and how crazy life can be without alcohol – life can actually be better.”